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20 Ways to Know You Read Too Much Romance

June 18th, 2009 | About 

Before I begin, thanks Susan for your 5 tells - they're hilarious!

Now, when it comes to our favorite literature is it possible to ever read too much of it? What are some of the tells of overindulgence in romance? Let's take a look!

You Know You Read Too Much Romance When...

  1. Most of your email is author newsletters telling you about latest releases, contests, and book signings.
  2. You insist on bringing a chaperone on romantic dates; even though you're 25 years old.
  3. You own a digital copy of every print romance book on your favorite’s shelf.
  4. Your favorite’s shelf is now the entire bookcase and the area in front of it on the floor.
  5. You have a plot trope, character type, or preference you are too embarrassed to share with other romance readers.

hqn2

  1. Your bookshelves are classified first by subgenre, then by author.
  2. After kissing each other breathless, you accidentally say, "Please Lord Mark take me now to your bedchamber."
  3. He says, "I know-I know you can't spend the night with me because your aunt Lady Marie will start the rumor-mill."
  4. Your fictional boyfriend is Mr. Darcy, Mr. Thornton, or another romantic alpha hero.
  5. You once had to question where the hymen was located, because most romance novels have the hero penetrate it somewhere inside the vagina instead of at the opening.

harlequin-art-exhibit

  1. You clip the covers off your romances and make a mantitty wallpaper collage.
  2. The name Vladimir de Laaf, the Duke of Longwood, sounds like a valid name for a man and Lady Saramia, the Widow of Evesham, makes for an equally good heroine name.
  3. In your mind, being unwed and over twenty is a crime.
  4. When making love-you find yourself moaning, "Oh yes, all the way to the hilt!"
  5. You’re actually disappointed he showed up in his Lexus....where's the black stallion?

hqn4

  1. You own or are following every romance blog you encounter or have written blog posts for them.
  2. If the first thing you can find in your purse is your latest romance read.
  3. You’ve attended more than five romance conventions just because. Jane Austen and Regency period conventions count, even if they aren't about books at all, because the subgenres are prominent.
  4. You can spot a secret baby within a 100 yards.
  5. If you ever daydreamed about being a heroine in one.

Bonus 21: If you’re like me than you’ve come to the conclusion, there’s never too romance in your life!

Photo Credits: rtbookreviews

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11 comments ↓
#1 Meghan on 06.18.09 at 5:13 am

Haha! This is a fantastic list. I don’t do any of these things, except maybe the last one, but I know where they all come from!

#2 Kim on 06.18.09 at 7:07 am

I never thought of doing #11! Project!

Did most of the rest of them though I don’t think that it’s possible to read “too much” romance.

#3 Amy on 06.18.09 at 7:45 am

I was going to say — the hero, your hero, driving up in a black Lexus might not be all that bad. Especially if you’re a fan of vintage Jayne Ann Krentz! But I guess you’re talking historicals here, so I say…yes, yes, yes!

#4 Isabel Roman on 06.18.09 at 8:23 am

16.You own or are following every romance blog you encounter or have written blog posts for them.

What’s your point? OK, I’m cracking up here! That was a great list, and yes, I KNOW I read too many romances. Write them, too, lol. Though I don’t carry them in my purse. I have learned it’s easier to bring another PB since there’s less to explain. And if I see one more eye roll over a sexy cover…*G*

Excellent list!

#5 Keira on 06.18.09 at 9:02 am

From Twitter:

stefanpinto: @reviewromance #19 is clever although admittedly frightening

laughs evilly…

#6 Susan on 06.18.09 at 12:04 pm

I’m guilty of too many on that list & The Duke of Longwood is not only an an acceptable name but he’d
have a “Long” list of women waiting to be courted.(evil laugh)
I do carry a romance novel in my purse & my Kindle is actually an extension of my left hand. (LOL)

#7 Lisa on 06.18.09 at 12:56 pm

Love the list!! Now, I’m going to add one more romance to read…my first book was just published and released, maybe it will become one your visitors love to read!!!

Too much romance is not an option!!!
Lisa Renee Faust :)
http://www.eloquentbooks.com/TheRoadToLove.html
http://www.myspace.com/road_to_love

#8 One Lady's Trash on 06.18.09 at 6:31 pm

Is it bad that I read this post and thought, “I haven’t done a lot of these things…Challenge!”

On a side note, I love the photos from Harlequin’s The Heart of a Woman exhibit.

#9 Samanther on 06.18.09 at 7:57 pm

Hurhur, “Duke of Longwood.” *giggles uncontrollably*

#10 Keira on 06.18.09 at 11:55 pm

Thank you Samanther! I totally got a kick out name creation lol ;)

#11 Stumbling Over Chaos :: Bookcase flash! (and some other book stuff, of course) on 06.24.09 at 2:06 am

[...] Twenty signs that you might be reading too much romance. This was my personal favorite: “You clip the covers off your romances and make a mantitty wallpaper collage.” Reading Update Even Demons Get the Blues by Maree Anderson. ebook. This was well-written and steamy novella. More detail at Fang-tastic Books. Sins and Shadows: A Shadows Inquiries Novel by Lyn Benedict. Very powerful urban fantasy about a PI dealing in the supernatural. No vampires, CarrieK! Plenty of gods (Greek, Christian), witches, and even an ancient being of riddles… My only real complaint was that it dragged a bit near the end. Well, that and that I sort of wished it was a paranormal romance, so I could get the HEA I wanted for the ending. Pandora’s Box by Natalie Stenzel. Totally reading these out of order – this is the first book in Stenzel’s series about the puca brothers and associates. I’m sure I would’ve picked this up sooner if the cover was as, um, enticing as those of the sequels! What Happens in Vegas… After Dark by Jodi Lynn Copeland, Lauren Dane, Kit Tunstall, and Anya Bast. Excellent and scorching hot collection about the paranormal side of Las Vegas. *fans self* Oh, you’ll have to click through to see the cover – bit too scorching! Review at Fang-tastic Books. The Highwayman (Silhouette Nocturne: Wicked Games) by Michele Hauf. This title might sound familiar. Heart of the Dragon, Jewel of Atlantis, and The Nymph King (Atlantis, Books 1-3) by Gena Showalter. The Greek gods created Atlantis to house their mistakes: vampires, demons, gorgons, nymphs, harpies, humans who can turn into dragons, and more. Although the two entrances to Atlantis are protected by veils of mist, humans manage to find the mythical land and Atlanteans occasionally make brief forays into our world. This is another good series from Gena Showalter. Of the first three books, The Nymph King was definitely my least favorite (I thought it was a bit weak), although I can’t fault the cover! I also read The Amazon’s Curse, which is an ebook novella that takes place after the fourth book, which I haven’t read yet. Whoops. Hey, it was on my ebook reader and I’d forgotten The Nymph King at home. Be warned that The Amazon’s Curse does contain spoilers for the fourth book. Just One of the Guys by Kristan Higgins. Nicely done contemporary romance. I cried a bit. In fact, my only real issue with the book (and I’m beginning to suspect this is just part of the author’s formula) is the main character’s obsession with her ticking biological clock. Also, please note that the dog on the cover in no way resembles the dog in the book, other than that they’re both dogs. Too Hot To Handle by Robin Kaye. Another nicely done contemporary romance, featuring a male lead who’s a bit less alpha arrogant than in many romances. Of course, what would be a bookcase flash from my place without a cat in the picture? [...]

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