Why is it so Darn Hot When Commitment-Phobes Make the Commitment?

by Guest Blogger on January 16, 2012 · 2 comments

in Black Sheep and Bad Boys, Cooking, Guest Blogger, S-U

Guest post by Amanda Usen, author of Scrumptious

Oh, boy. Back in the day, before I met my perfect husband, I never met a bad boy I didn’t want to…date. Emotionally unavailable men were my favorite flavor. The more distant the man, the more I wanted to stand beside him. It started in high school when the uber-cool artistic senior drama dude took an interest, and then gave me my first taste of “it’s not you, it’s me,” a few months later.

I was hooked, so hooked I dated (off and on for THREE YEARS) a psychology major in college who responded to my every legitimate relationship complaint with “I’m sorry you feel that way.” Even my perfect husband appeared to be a bad boy when I met him. I call him my sheep in wolf’s clothing because he tricked me. (Thank goodness.) Oh, yeah, I had it bad. The question is: why?

What is it about the men who don’t want us, the guy we can have for a night but not a relationship, or the one that got away, that enchants us? And why is it so intoxicating when they finally succumb to true love? These questions fascinate me. Although I broke my bad boy addiction and am now unconditionally adored, I still live with the ghosts of boyfriends past. I can’t chase them anymore (marriage will do that to a girl) but I can bring them to life in my characters.

In Scrumptious, I deliberately set out to create the baddest boy of them all, Joe Rafferty. During his two years at Culinary Arts College, he slept with “every available female, a few unavailable ones, three mail clerks, and at least one chef-instructor.” Joe is a traveling chef-for-hire so commitment-phobic that the only thing that could get him to consider settling down is a deathbed command from his mother.

Enter Marlene Bennet, a love ‘em and leave ‘em pastry chef who imagines “a night with Joe would be an experience to remember. Fondly.” When he turns down her proposition, he becomes the ultimate challenge…a man whom everyone has had – but her.

What are the perfect ingredients of a bad boy?

In Joe’s case, he’s tall, dark and delicious. He’s such hot chef hardly anyone can keep up with him on the line. He’s left a trail of broken hearts behind him, so he’s jaded. Most alluring of all, he’s got issues, little holes in his heart just waiting for the right healing touch. In my opinion, that’s what makes a bad boy.

He’s attractive, talented, experienced and hurting, even if he doesn’t know it or won’t admit it – especially if he won’t admit it. If you can get that guy’s attention, then you are special. And if he decides you are the one, then you have triumphed where all else have failed. *Sigh* Triumph is incendiary.

But that’s just my opinion. I’m a sucker for a hot guy with a bored expression and the first one to admit I’ve got a competitive steak. What about you? What do you think makes a bad boy? And why is it so sweet when the “unattainable man” finally commits?

Buy: Scrumptious

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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Na S. January 16, 2012 at 11:50 AM

A bad boy to me in romance is all about his vibe. He’s dark, brooding or even down to earth but uses sarcasm and a sullen facade to hide a damaged past. He really has a good heart but isn’t up to showing it off. When these bad boys are redeemed it feels so worthwhile and you sense it takes a special woman to do that. Very romantic!

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2 Amanda Usen January 16, 2012 at 4:29 PM

Na S. – I agree with you 100 percent. Love redeemed bad boys! :-)

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